Saturday, June 21, 2008

Slight Change in Plans

The day for Jane's burial service has changed.

We are planning to have a burial service at the Oaklawn Cemetery in Corvallis on Thursday, June 26th at 1:00pm. Anyone who is interested in participating may join us at that time. Please be sure to check Doug's Blog, just in case something changes between now and then.

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

It Had to End Sometime

Well dear friends, I have decided that tonight will be the last posting on Jane's blog. I conclude this entry on her behalf, with no small amount of sorrow.

All things must pass, as it is said. As I read back through the past 17 months of Jane's blog, I have been reminded of the bravery, hope, faith, and optimism that Jane lived each and every day. She never faltered, never wavered, during her battle with that terrible disease.

I am in the process of compiling posts from both Jane's and my blog, and will eventually publish a book using My Publisher, and will make it available to those who would like to have a reminder of our journey together. I have created a photo book of slides from Jane's memorial service that you can see online, and if you're interested, even purchase a copy for yourselves.

In the meantime, Doug's Blog is still active, and will remain so as long as I have motivation to continue writing. I invite you to join in on my solo flight into uncharted territory as I begin to learn how to live life without my best friend.

We are planning to have a burial service at the Oaklawn Cemetery in Corvallis on Friday, June 27th at 1:00pm. Anyone who is interested in participating may join us at that time. Please be sure to check Doug's Blog, just in case something changes between now and then.

Thank you, everyone, for your faithful participation in reading, and commenting on this blog.

And as I close for Jane, I believe she would say not, "Goodbye" but rather, "See you later."

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

My Dearest Family

NOTE: This is a letter that Jane wrote to her family just after Christmas of 2007. To my knowledge, it was never sent to them. I believe that [it] will bless them (and you) immensely.

My dearest family,

First, I’d like to say what a great time I had visiting you all a few weeks ago. It was probably one of the best visits I’ve had there. Thanks to all who came out for dinner, thanks for the special gifts, for Jeff taking me to Powell’s candy store and seeing the Christmas lights around Willow Glen.

Thanks especially to Sue and George for buying my airline ticket! It was so good seeing all the great-nieces and nephews too, they are all growing up! I missed those who could not make it, but we did good getting 30 of us to squeeze in the restaurant! Though it was hard leaving, I left San Jose feeling really proud of and grateful for my family.

It’s good to see the progress in those who have struggled with drugs and alcohol. I know too well how hard it is to stay clean and sober, and my hats are off to you who are working on conquering this.

I am grateful that Scotty came home from Iraq safe and sound, that you all seem to have good paying jobs and healthy kids. I am also happy to see Jeff committed to leading people in worship and helping them on their spiritual journeys. There truly is no higher calling.

People often wonder “why am I here?” Well, if you want to know, it’s rather simple: to honor your Creator in all you do, and to love your neighbor as yourself. Is this easy? Not always. And it is different and personal for everyone. But the journey is worth is, because these are the only rewards that are eternal.

You all are raising beautiful and gifted children. Take time to help them learn what their life passions are and do whatever you can to help them achieve their goals. The phone, the computer, the TV . . . these can wait. Your kids will be grown before you know it and these times can never be recaptured.

Also, Grandpa is not getting any younger! Please take time to visit him when you can and help out. I know it would also help Aunt Sue a lot. Time goes by really fast, you guys. Enjoy it now. There is no guarantee of the future. We only have today. Things can come into your life and change it in an instant. Perspective and priorities can change in the blink of an eye.

I am headed into my 2nd year of battling cancer. The hope is that after my next two treatments (last one is Jan. 23), the PET scan will show a remission of the cancer and I can be a candidate for the IPHC surgery I opted not to do last May. Statistically, this surgery doubles the life expectancy in a third of the patients. Of course, I do not leave God out of these equations! I listen to ‘statistics’ with a grain of salt, as much as I can. But, as they say, drastic times call for drastic measures.

This is not an easy journey, especially when you have kids still dependent on you. My concern is often more for them than myself. Yet we have so many friends and family who have stepped up to help us in ways that we never anticipated. They have lifted a tremendous burden from us. I know they are truly ‘the hands of God’ for us right now. We are being well cared for!

Overall, I have peace in my heart and spirit. I want to stay around as long as I possibly can. I don’t feel finished here. I will fight as long as I can handle it. But I also need to bend to whatever the will of God is for me. He has a much broader picture than I! All in all, I know I am in good hands, whatever the outcome.

I also want you to know that I have no problem whatsoever talking about this, so if you want to talk or have questions, just call me. You can also check my blog at

I love you all!! I truly hope that 2008 is a good one for each one of us. I’m sure it will bring challenges, but let’s learn from them and move forward! May the Lord’s peace shine upon you!


Monday, June 9, 2008

Photos of Memorial Service

I don't believe that it was mentioned today, but there was some symbolism behind the flower arrangements, that I'd like to share with you.

First of all, there were 53 carnations, light purple and dark purple. Carnations are Jane's favorite flower, and there were 53 to signify her 53 year walk upon this earth.

The flowers were separated into three vases. The two large vases each held 25 carnations, and the slender one in the middle held three. Two dark purple and one light purple. The two dark purple carnations signified her two sons, Matthew and Daniel, and the light purple carnation signified her daughter, Amy.

The etched brass urn carrying the cremains.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

My Angel Weeps With Me

I found this image on the internet, and it really spoke to me. I like to think of this as my guardian angel, weeping alongside me.

Then when we've composed ourselves, my angel helps me get back to my feet, wipe away my tears, and go back to living.

Tomorrow is Jane's memorial service; I'm sure my angel will be with me then. Look for her, she's the one with the beautiful wings.

Saturday, June 7, 2008

You're My Hero

NOTE: Amy has given me permission to share [one of] the letters that she frequently wrote to Jane while she was sick. I think Jane did find a way to "look down from Heaven and let Amy know she is alright." See Doug's blog.

Friday, June 6, 2008

River of Life

Every day that goes by, something changes. The river of life continues to flow; relentless, never stopping. It meanders, changes course, ebbs and flows, but continues steadily on.

As I ride on my raft on the river of life, there are times when I have been able to see well ahead on a calm, lazy section of water. At other times, I hear the faint sound of rushing water, and round a bend, only to be slammed up against rocks and trees; sometimes tumbling under, scratching and clawing my way to the surface, climbing back on top of the raft.

Jane's sister Terry left this morning; a few minutes ago. She stood by my side, and helped care for Jane for the past 5 weeks. Terry made sacrifices of love, money, and time to honor me and Jane in caring for her at the end of life. It was very hard to see her go, yet another bend in the river of life.